Category Archives: Uncategorized

Collect

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Elephant
I come from a long line of women who love to collect things. My Nana, fondly named Nana knickknack, had quite the collection of hummels. And my little sister went through a phase of collecting salt and pepper shakers. What do I collect, you might ask. Elephants. Little statutes of these amazing creatures make me oh so happy. I remember the first one I ever bought… it was a few years back and I was in San Francisco celebrating my sister’s 28th birthday. There is just something about their strength that has always captured me.

In doing a bit more research, I learned that elephants have amazing memories. They show us that by supporting and loving one another, our own ability to thrive in the physical world is enhanced. What a beautiful thought. And those nearest and dearest to me know my memory is one of my greatest assets. A kinship perhaps with these magnificent creatures. I dream to one day meet one face to face. Until then, I will continue to add to my collection. This one may just be on its way to me.

So, what do you collect? Would love to know.

Milestones

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photo
I can hardly believe it has been a year since I took the leap and launched this little blog. First and foremost, I want to thank you, my sweet readers, who have provided endless support and inspiration. I set out to create a space where I could share my favorite things… recipes, places, travels, fashion finds and of course the personal stuff. It’s a bit scary to put my feelings and hardships out there but you have proven that putting it out there is the best form of healing there is.

This past weekend, a friend of mine asked “so what’s your vision for your blog? What do you want it to become?” And my answer is quite simple. I want this blog to continue to be a place I share my days with you. As I look to the next year, I hope to post on a more consistent basis. I mean the blog title is “A Day with May”, right?!

Part of the reason I moved back to my little island was to heal, be still and learn a bit more about myself. And one thing I have come to realize is I can’t do it all on my own and thus am asking for your help (big step). I would love your thoughts and ideas on new content. What posts have resonated most with you? Any that you didn’t like? Any topics that I have completely missed? And please, be honest. It’s how we grow.

I will say it once more… thank you, thank you, thank you again for all your support. It means more than words will ever allow me to express!

To H

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Letter H
My dearest H… I am so excited that I get to see you next week. Can’t wait to see the new house and your new room. Are you having so much fun? Thinking hide and seek in all the rooms will be a must!

One thing I know you are just beginning to learn about is the great joy(s) of being a big sister. As your mama might have told you, Auntie May comes from a rather large family. I am blessed to be the big sister to not only two sisters but three brothers. And let me tell you, at times it can be a bit challenging. You see, we are all so unique in our needs, desires and how we communicate with each other. So, my words of advice for you this week is get to know what makes your little sister smile. Is it reading Thomas the Train? Or playing dress-up in your closet? These things will certainly change with time but it is important to take the time to really get to know your sister. And in turn, I promise she will get to know you too.

Alright little H. Sweet dreams and I will see you on Monday!

Remembrance

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The world changed that day. 12 years ago. I was just three weeks away from moving to Boston and so hopeful for that next chapter of my life to begin. I had spent the summer working at an island law firm in the hopes that it would help me land that big city job. I remember the first phone call that morning. Andy R. The high-intensity NY businessman who was not only selling an island home but purchasing one the next day. “A plane has crashed into the World Trade Center. I can see the smoke from New Jersey.” I hung up the phone confused. How could this be? I had been on the observation deck years earlier. I was told that on a clear day you could see the curvature of the earth.

We were unable to access the Internet at the time as the network was congested (hard to believe, I know). And then, the second call letting us know what was going on. An attack. Thinking about it now it is still difficult to comprehend the magnitude. My innocence was lost that day. But in the days that followed, my faith in human kind ignited. In the end, love will conquer all. We must love our neighbors, our partners, our friends, our adversaries and most of all, ourselves. Remember this!

I stumbled upon this poem earlier. The beauty of the written word is so powerful. Holding you all close to my heart this evening!

Bright blue September skies
Hold all of the promises of tomorrow
And all of the memories of the past
September has a language of its own
One that I am not sure I understand most years
Where fall means stand up and hurt means
Hold on and hold still and hold up
September brings clear night stars
Which invite me to swallow the failures of before
And the regret of unfinished and to taste the sweet
Big Dipper full of the human experience
All good and bad and ugly and utterly elusive
No matter how much it hurts
When the hydrangeas start to go by
It’s time to soothe my heart again
To empty it of the pain of loss
And to keep the good and feel in my soul
That we never forget love and it all stays
All of it, every last little coffee date or hand in hand
We get to keep it, and add to it
What a precious privilege that is,
To know beyond certainty
That all of the days of my life
No matter what
I am the one
Who gets to keep your love.

Source: http://darlingmagazine.org/blue-september/

An Education

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MHC
Mount Holyoke College. The oldest all-women’s college in the country. My alma mater. Gosh, I loved my time there. Hard to believe that today the Class of 2017 moved onto campus.

Last week, I came across an article listing out the “Top 5 Reasons to Consider a Women’s College“. So for all your young ladies out there considering your schools of choice (Kate, this may be for you), here is my “Top 5” list of reasons to consider MHC:

1. The people – I know I am quite biased, but the student population at Mount Holyoke is the creme de la creme. The women I shared the classroom with came from literally all corners of the globe and truly taught me just as my professors did. And the friendships I made, they have stood the test of time. My nearest and dearest are my sisters from MHC!

2. The campus – Consistently ranked one of the most beautiful campuses in the country, the grounds at Mount Holyoke are breathtaking. Walking around upper lake after a long day of studies always provided that little bit of reprieve I needed. The gates, the ivy-covered buildings, the dorms themselves (walk-in closets, why yes). I still get shivers down my spine driving up Rt. 116 and seeing the clock and the infamous gates.

3. The food – Milk and cookies, gracious meals, Tailgate Picnic… and that is without even crossing the hill to Amherst or the water to Northampton. Really, the happy valley is where it’s at. Seriously, though, if you chose MHC, you will be spoiled by the dining options. And no, I did not put on the “freshmen 15” thanks to the mandatory P.E. requirements!

4. The legacy – I was so proud to be the first in my family to graduate from college and walking across the stage in Kendall to receive my diploma (sadly it was raining so we didn’t graduate in the amphitheatre), was one of the best days of my life. But, the truly great thing is the recognition I have received over the past 10 years as a product of a women’s college. Our legacy is strong and deep and one that just gets better with age. And, returning back to campus for reunions and seeing the women who graduated before returning nearly 60 years later, it is overwhelming. A sisterhood like no other.

5. And of course, the education – Cause really, that is what college is all about. First and foremost, Mount Holyoke is part of the 5 College consortium, which means you can take classes at Hampshire, Smith, Amherst and UMass. A great value to pass along to your parents. In all seriousness, though, the time that my professors put into my studies was remarkable. Almost all were willing to meet with me at anytime to discuss a project, an assignment, that paper that I just couldn’t get started. And, the other really cool thing is that I connected with a handful outside of the classroom. Dinners at their homes, babysitting their little ones, it was a family. And one that at times, you need.

This quote pretty much sums up my feeling on why you should go to Mount Holyoke: “We need women who are so strong that they can be gentle, so educated that they can be humble, so fierce that they can be compassionate, so passionate that they can be rational, and so disciplined that they can be free. We need uncommon women. And here you are. And how deeply reassuring to me it is to know that wherever we go, there you will be.” Mount Holyoke is the meeting place of uncommon women. So, if you are uncommon, MHC is the place for you. Look forward to having you as a sister in the future!

Friendship

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Friendship
Friends, you overwhelm me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all your kind words concerning yesterday’s post. I don’t think I could be where I am today without you so please remember that!

Time

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love
Eight years ago I thought my life was just beginning. I was standing in front of my childhood church wearing a white dress, my veil blowing in the summer breeze and ready to walk down the aisle to a man I had known for six years. And that day, everything changed.

I wish I could say it was the kind of love Hollywood movies are made of. A year later, I was standing in front of a judge ending it all. At the time, I thought I had lost everything. How could I ever love another again, trust again, feel again.

Over the last several years, I have learned a very valuable lesson… to love myself. In reflecting back on my courtship, engagement and marriage, I was taken aback by how many times I put my wants, needs and desires aside. I thought my life was complete taking care of another, worrying about another. There are certainly times in relationships where one gives more than they receive but the truly tragic piece of my love story was that I was always giving. Those who know me well, know that this is my personality type. But, what was my impetus for always giving more. Was it control? Was I trying to make it perfect so he would never leave?

This is my truth… my impetus for giving was based in fear. As a child of divorce, I thought I knew what caused the breakdown of a marriage. I had seen my parents fight about money, our home and the upkeep of it and about something as trivial as dinner. And so, I set out to right these things. I strove for perfection in our home, in my work and in myself. I tried to do everything in my power to make sure we wouldn’t fail. But we did. The reason my marriage failed was because I was acting to right the past.

At the time of my divorce, I had just turned 27. Those closest to me said I would be married again by 30. Here I am at 34, single. This past year has been a significant time of reflection for me. Figuring out what I want, who I am and who I want to become. Over the past month or so, I have come to the realization that once again I have let fear control my actions. When asked “do you want to marry again?” my typical response has been “I don’t know. I have been down that path before. Is it really worth it.” Or, “do you want children.” Again, my response is “I don’t know if that’s my story.” I have been afraid to say what I want as I fear that if I say it, and it doesn’t happen, I will once again be a failure.

So, today on this anniversary of mine, I am going to lay this fear of failure to bed. There is nothing more in this life I want than to fall in love with my best friend. I want a man who will make me laugh. Who when we are together, my cheeks hurt from all the smiling and laughing we do together. For as Rose Franken said, “Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly.” I want someone to explore this amazing world with. Who challenges me. Who makes me see things in a new, interesting and different light. Who will be there when I fall and who will let me be there when he falls. And one day, I hope we will enjoy the joys of parenthood.

I am so very grateful for the failure of my first marriage. Funny to say that now but it’s the truth. He wasn’t the man for me. Do I still love him dearly? Of course and I always will. But I know there is something greater out there for me and I can’t wait to see it unfold!